Texts From Last Night
by MegalegU
Summary: Those moments when the students of Beacon Hills High wished they never had texted those things. Or, Derek and Stiles form an unlikely friendship, Lydia texts the wrong person, Issac dresses questionably and Jackson finally, totally and completely, cries at The Notebook.


**A/N: So...odd idea...but here it is. Also - most grammatical errors/misspellings are intentional! Translation: half of these texts - they're supposed to be drunk. **

* * *

**Saturday, July 13****th****, 1:34AM**

**Stiles **to **Derek: **Ddderekkkk! My fav werewolffffff!

**Derek: **Are you drunk?

**Stiles: **Drunk? Wazzthat?

**Derek: **Where are you? I'm coming to get you.

**Stiles: **Um…Scottshouse mayb

**Derek: **Maybe?

**Stiles: **Pshh idk maaan

**Derek: **Don't do anything ELSE stupid before I get there.

**Stiles: **DEREK THEY'RE DOING KAREOKE! We should sing aaaaaa duet!

**Derek: **Don't you DARE grab that microphone or I'll make you ride in my trunk.

**Stiles: **Which trunk are we talking here? ;)

**Derek: **Oh…my God.

...

...

**Sunday, July 14****th****, 12:39PM**

**Derek: **Hey, Scott – is Stiles…gay?

**Scott: **What? No! Why would you ask that?

**Derek: **He was being very…odd in his texts last night.

**Scott: **He was DRUNK last night.

**Derek: **People often tell the truth under intoxication.

**Scott: **Who are you, Dr. Drew? He's not gay. I would know.

**Derek: **Um…you would?

**Scott: **Ugh – nevermind! I'll be over at your house for the meeting in ten.

...

...

**Monday, July 15****th****, 10:45PM**

**Allison: **You're a WILF

**Scott: **Wtf?

**Allison: **Werewolf I'd like to…

**Scott: **Um…are you feeling okay?

**Allison: **I'm AWESOME.

**Scott: **Okay, Allison? I think you should get some sleep.

**Allison: **With YOU?

**Scott: **I'll come over. But we'll just SLEEP. Okay?

**Allison: **Sureeeee.

...

...

**Tuesday, July 16****th****, 11:30AM**

**Stiles: **What is up with Scott and Allison lately? They're more…lovey-dovey than normal.

**Derek: **Mating season.

**Stiles: **Ha. Ha. Ha. Wait. For real?

**Stiles: **Derek?

**Stiles: **IS THAT A THING?

...

...

**Friday, July 19****th****, 8:30PM**

**Issac **to **Stiles: **Stiiiilllllleeeeeesssssss

**Stiles: **How did you get my number?

**Issac: **I have waaaays, noble one

**Stiles: **Why the hell are you texting me?

**Issac: **I'm lonely.

**Stiles: **Oh my God…just hang out with Catwoman.

**Issac: **ya know, Erica digs that

**Stiles: **For real?

**Issac: **yeah, she ALWAYS goin on bout you

**Stiles: **I don't know whether to be flattered or extremely frightened.

...

...

**Saturday, July 20****th****, 7:54PM**

**Jackson **to **Scott: **What would happen if you and Allison had a baby? Would it come out as a werewolf?

**Scott: **DUDE! What is your problem!

**Jackson: **This is a legit question, man. Why have you not thought of this before?

...

**9:20PM**

**Lydia **to **Stiles: **rrrrrrrr

**Stiles: **?

**Lydia: **Sorry. Butt-texted…Jackson had me pressed up against the car.

**Stiles: **MY EYES! THANKS A LOT FOR THAT IMAGE.

...

...

**Friday, August 8th, 6:40AM**

**Stiles **to **Scott: **PSST.

**Scott: **What's up?

**Stiles: **…I'm in a strange person's bed.

**Scott: **Wtf? What are you talking about? Where are you?

**Stiles: **I don't know! Whoever it is, their blanket smells amazing.

**Scott: **STILES! WHERE. ARE. YOU?

**Stiles: **Oh, shit, ya know what? I think this is Erica's bed.

**Scott: **?

**Stiles: **GOTTA GO!

...

...

S**aturday, August 17th, 11:00PM**

**Lydia **to **Stiles: **I can't decide whether or not to go commando under my dress…

**Stiles: **UHHHH? First of all, do girls even SAY commando? Why the hell are you asking me? Not that I don't appreciate that you asked but…

**Lydia: **Allison, this is urgent. Matters.

**Stiles: **This isn't Allison…

**Lydia: **Damn it.

...

...

**Sunday, August 18th, 2:20AM**

**Stiles **to **Scott: **CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!

**Scott: **Please tell me you aren't dancing on top of a table. Again.

...

**3:45AM**

**Jackson **to **Derek: **Do you only own leather jackets? I neva see ya in anything else.

**Derek: **Why do you have a sudden interest in my fashion choices?

**Jackson: **I mean…it's a good look…a very good look butttt why

**Derek: **Someone needs to take your phone away once you have beer.

**Jackson: **Someone needs to take your clothes away.

...

...

**Wednesday, August 21st, 9:00AM**

**Stiles **to **Scott: **Did we both pass out talking about cupcakes last night?

...

...

**Thursday, August 22nd, 12:00AM**

**Derek **to **Stiles: **If I don't make it out of this and get arrested, DON'T WORRY – that chick at the police station totes has the hots. Alls I gotta do is pretend like I dropped somethin

...

**Friday, August 23rd, 7:22AM**

**Allison **to **Lydia: **Did something bad happen last night?

**Lydia: **You asked if you could throw up in my purse.

**Allison **to **Lydia: **Tell me why I'm wearing water wings right now.

...

**11:45PM**

**Jackson **to **Scott: **I'm way classier than you when I'm drunk. I can STAND.

**Stiles: **Either I danced in a flash mob last night or my hallucinations learned how to pop and lock.

...

**Saturday, August 24th, 12:00AM**

**Lydia **to **Allison: **Your dad is actually kinda hot.

**Allison: **Oh my God…

...

**3:25PM**

**Stiles **to **Scott: **Did Derek hold you up last night and sing "The Circle of Life" really loudly?

**Scott: **…no.

**Stiles: **Then I've had one crazy dream to tell you about…

...

**Tuesday, August 27th, 9:55PM**

**Scott** to **Derek**: What if we all wore capes next time we went up against some hunters and called us The Pack Attack?

...

**Wednesday, August 28th, 10:07PM**

**Stiles** to **Derek** & **Scott**: Next time you guys Change I'm playing "Eye of the Tiger" and you can't say NUTHIN'.

...

**Thursday, August 29th, 8:45AM**

**Scott** to** Stiles**: You threw a bone at me last night and called me Lassie.

**Stiles** to **Scott**: Jackson tried to get me to go out last night 'cause I am 'too single'. I am so not single. I am in a committed relationship with my Mac.

**Scott**: Please don't give me any more details.

...

**Friday, September 8th, 9:59PM**

**Stiles** to** Derek**: You need to tame your new wolf, Erica. She beat me up last night with a box of frozen waffles.

...

**Saturday, September 9th, 7:07AM**

**Jackson** to **Scott**: I cried last night watching The Notebook. Don't tell Lydia.

...

**8:43AM**

**Derek** to **Issac**: You wore a tutu last night.

**Issac**: REBECCA BLACK IS ON YOUR 'TOP 25 PLAYED' LIST. DO NOT JUDGE ME.

...

**10:14AM**

**Lydia** to **Allison**: …girl, I don't remember anything else other than you running around with a can of Cheez-Whiz and asking 'where the crackers at?'

...

**12:00PM**

**Scott** to **Stiles**: You left your Batman action figures in my mom's car.

**Stiles** to **Scott**: I think I told everyone last night that I'm a foot model.

**Scott**: You also passed out in the pool.

**Stiles**: Oh, no…

* * *

The end!


End file.
